Love yourself for a healthier relationship
“Talk to yourself as you would to someone you love.”
– Brene Brown
What does it mean to date your reflection? First, let’s be clear: this isn’t about physically dating your own reflection.
However, people’s relationships with others are generally expressions of their relationship with themselves. For better or for worse, a person’s self-esteem can affect their relationships with family members, friends, and partners. When you don’t love yourself or even hate yourself, it’s harder to develop a healthy dynamic with the people around you. So it’s incredibly important to spend time building a good relationship with yourself, learning what is and isn’t important to you, and figuring out what you want and need in every aspect of your life. When you respect and love yourself, you can go so much further.
Set a good precedent
“The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.”
– Robert Holden
Imagine being in a relationship with someone you don’t love, who you consider to be seriously flawed or maybe even worthless. Would this relationship bring happiness into your life? How would it affect your everyday life? Would that be a sustainable dynamic? Now imagine that the person you are in this relationship with is…you. This is the reality for people who don’t take the time to develop a positive relationship with themselves. If you don’t love yourself, if you don’t give yourself the time and energy that you give others, you end up in a situation that just can’t last.
If you don’t believe that you are worthy of a balanced, healthy, loving relationship – if you don’t love yourself – then you may be manifesting an inadequate match. In fact, you might not even allow yourself a chance to find the right one. This is the core principle behind the idea of Dating Your Reflection. It’s not about dating someone who is exactly like you in every way. Rather, it is about being on the same level emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Think of it a bit as a degree in emotional maturity. If you only understand who you are and what you need at the bachelor’s level, you will most likely not attract someone who is at the master’s level. They will look for someone who has a similar level of insight and confidence as they do.
In order to create the life you want to live, it is important to love yourself or at least get along well with yourself. Self-esteem, self-awareness, and self-esteem are not ugly words or selfish tools. They are necessary for humans to ensure that both what they send out into the universe and what they receive back can serve their highest good.
The transition from believing you are useless to realizing your own worth and learning to love yourself is rarely a linear progression. Most of the time it’s twisty and confusing. However, there is a lot to learn on such a journey, and when you have gone through it, you may just be thankful that you have chosen a happier path.
Take time for yourself
“Self-care is never a selfish act — it’s simply good use of the only gift I have, the gift I was brought to earth to offer to others.”
– Parker Palmer
People tend to cling to the notion that making regular time for one’s needs is somehow a form of selfishness. This couldn’t be further from the truth! The clouds need to gather water to rain again, and humans are no different. Take the time you need to make sure your needs are being met and that you are remembering to love yourself. This, in turn, will enable you to be there for the people in your life.
“The people we relate to are always a mirror reflecting our own beliefs, and at the same time we are a mirror reflecting their beliefs.”
– Shakti Gawain
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